Chapter 1
Jamie pushed his way through the flap of the green hospital tent carrying Kent’s bleeding body over his shoulder. He found his way to the only open cot and with help, set his friend down before collapsing himself. Lauren, an Army doctor, rushed over and quickly changed gloves with the rhythm and efficiency of someone who did this countless times a day.
“What have we got?” she asked. There was no time for niceties.
“Nurse, he’s been shot.”
“I’m a doctor. Where was he shot?” The soldier gasping for breath, barely conscious on the canvas cot, was covered in blood from his ribs down and its source was unclear. Jamie had run carrying Kent’s limp body all the way from the front lines as bullets whizzed past him, and grenades exploded close enough to knock him off balance. He was driven by a mad instinct to save his best friend’s life. Nothing else mattered. If Kent were dying today, Jamie would be going with him, to heaven or to hell.
“I don’t know, doctor. I don’t know.”
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
“I mean I don’t know. I didn’t stop to investigate! He was shot, I picked him up and I ran, I just ran.”
Lauren turned her attention to the man on the cot. “Okay, okay, you did well. I’m sorry. Soldier, can you tell me where you’re hit?”
“In the penis.”
“What?” the doctor asked.
“I was shot in the penis, nurse.” Kent repeated.
“I’m a doctor! I need to see the wound.” she said without emotion. She was a doctor. She’d seen many penises.
“Not with him here.” Kent replied, nodding his head toward Jamie.
“Dude, for real? I just ran across a live battlefield to save you. Not cool, man.”
“Please,” Dr. Lauren snapped, “Step outside. I need to see his penis to save his life!”
“Man, fuck this.” Jamie snapped, leaving the hospital tent in a huff.
“Okay, let’s see the wound.” Dr. Lauren said.
“I’ll show you, but you have to show me yours.” Kent just managed to say, coughing up a mouthful of blood.
“Soldier, I am trying to save your life. There’s no time!” the Dr. yelled.
“Then you better hurry and show me yours, because I’m not showing you mine unless you show me yours!”
“Goddammit!” Dr. Lauren grumbled, pulling down her scrubs and her panties. “Now let me see your penis before you bleed to death!”
Kent was pulling down his pants when Jamie ran back into the tent. “You guys!” he yelled, urgently.
“What is it, soldier? Was peace declared? Did we win!” Dr. Larsen asked, pulling up her pants.
“No, your mom is on her way with lemonade.”
Kent got his pants up just in time as Lauren’s mom stepped into the club house, pulling down the pillowcase they’d tacked up over the doorway. “Why do you all look so guilty?” she asked.
“We’re not guilty, mom. We’re playing war. This is a MASH unit.”
“Okay…” she said slowly, not sounding convinced. “I told you, the doorway stays open when you have your male friends over.” Mrs. Larsen said, as set down the plastic pitcher with three matching plastic cups.